I hate radio! I've hated radio for the last 20 years. There have been a few bright spots.

Scott Shannon- who somehow saved New York radio with the Morning Zoo-

Granted, it did start a long line of untalented, squeaky voiced imitators.

Howard Stern- Say what you will about the man he's managed to survive, make a ton of money and still be funny.

I hated to see Jackie The Jokeman go. Sorry Artie, you ain't that funny. Everybody has a bad coke story from the 90's, even my Grandma.

Opie & Anthony- Dirty, slightly racists, foul mouthed, titty obsessed prattle heads. Good God, how they make me laugh!

I vote we crown them as the First Shock Jocks of Satellite Radio and call it a day! Howard made the jump with more flair but they WERE first!

Ron & Fez- I could listen to these two all day. In fact, I play the old stuff at work every day, from WNEW to WJFK and over to XM. I listen, I laugh and repeat. If you ever get the chance, listen to their old promos or Comedy Pyramids and you'll know what I mean.

This brings me to my quote...

I'm sorry I called you a Southern whore...you're not that Southern!

As said by Ron Bennington on 1-10-02...the day before my 33rd birthday party. I remember that party, we had it at Jake's, where I drank more hard Cider and shots of Jack than I care to mention. That's a post for another day.

From the Cask to the Flask- Keep on drinking!

From dwell to the ink well- Keep on writing!

LCC

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A long time ago I started to collect quotes, from friends, family, movies, television anywhere- even porn. Yes, porn. I still use

'Fuck her like she wrote you a bad check!' (Cicra 2002)

I have about 10 notebooks filled with random lines and I try to use all of them in my day to day dealings with people. Some work like...

'Calm yourself! Don't get your nipples in an uproar.'  (circa 1989)

and some don't...

'Is this how our long firendship is suppose to end? Me running you over with steam roller and telling everyone you went on a bad diet.' (3-6-93)

Some are not mine but felt great when I said them...

'Women are like Lay's Potato Chips..you just can't eat just one.' (Kathy Kirton 2-25-93)

The thing of it is, I've used these lines to as a part of who I am, using them to fit the situation to help show who I am and what I believe in. And the weird thing is...it actually worked. So as a tribute to all that I've heard, read, said and wrote down I plan to pick a random quote (no matter how long..and trust me some of them ain't short.) and talk the who, when where and how fucked I was when I heard it.

So, to start I chosen the 'Random' setting on my Quote Selector 5000 .

Sometimes the brightest room in the House of Me is the one with the lamp called 'Tomorrow'.

And, sometimes things sound so bad they make you want to vomit in the toilet called 'Yesterday'

(Just Shoot Me 1-12-99)

Witty batner between Jack Gallow played by George Segal and Finch played by David Spade. Funny thing is, I watched this show the day AFTER my birthday (I turned 30 that year) and I have no recolection of the party, where it was or who was there. I couldn't even tell you if I got laid. I hope I did.

Anywell, I plan to keep going until I've blogged about all of the quotes that I've collected over the years. Yeah, it's going to be a bumby ride.

That's it from the pit-

From the cask to the flask-

Lincoln C.

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